Do something different

I want to do different things. I want to experience a new world set by my own rules. I want to write, create, imageine, travel, and never be held back. But I want someone to do it with me. I am constantly finding myself around people who tell me how things are done when they have no clue. Theatre people with no more experience then I have, telling me what theatre can and can't be, how I can't do certain things. Why? Because they've never seen it done that way, because they are afraid of anything new, because they think they have all the answers and are scared to admit they don't.

I don't have the answers, I just have my experiences.

Even now I've found a person who makes me so happy and she will talk about doing adventurerous things but she won't actually do them. This leaves me in a hard spot; do I calm my life until she is ready to adventure (which might never happen) or do I move on, leaving behind a chance at real happiness and maybe, a secure life. I'm not much of one for being secure, which is funny because I want security. Most of my fears arise out of my lack of a secure future. Like I know I'll be fine until I'm old but once I'm old... well the life I'm living now doesn't exactly provide a comfortable retirement plan.

I want people to do wild things with me. Like travel across Canada, hit every Province and Territory and stop wherever we want. This is something I could do on my own but I am, sadly, a very social creature and get very depressed when I can't share something with others. I want to write a comic book but every artist I know is intimidated by the idea. I want to write challenging theatre but people are scared to support theatre that is risky.

There isn't really an end to this post. I'm unsure of my path with this girl. And I'm still looking for someone who is looking for adventurers like I am.